


Girl Crush

by carmelfringe



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Boss Louis, Christmas, Christmas Party, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Office, Office Party, girl crush is also essential!, just a little bit of your heart is important in this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-23 20:20:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13197828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmelfringe/pseuds/carmelfringe
Summary: “I want to taste her lipsYeah, cause they taste like you"Harry is in love with his boss.Louis is Harry's boss.Add some poetry readings and Christmas spirit and you'll get a merry concoction.





	Girl Crush

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! 
> 
> Since I absolutely love Harry's cover of “Girl Crush" by Little Big Town I thought I'd write this fic.  
> I just really liked the one idea I had in my mind and since I got sick on Christmas I decided to finish writing this gem. 
> 
> (sorry for any mistakes, English is not my mother tongue!)

**_I got it real bad, want everything she has_ **

**_That smile and that midnight laugh_ **

**_She's giving you now_ **

 

It was not Louis Tomlinson’s best day. The stupid Smithson&Bradsaid they would be thirty minutes late to the meeting, which meant he’ll waste these thirty minutes on waiting for them, which meant his next meeting will be postponed. Which in the end meant he’s gonna stress even more and be home late. Perfect. 

 

“Harry, can you please be so kind and make me some coffee? I honestly can’t even afford to blink right now. I’m-”

“Drowning in paperwork, yeah I know. Coffee in five.” Harry smiled a tight-lipped smile and nodded. 

“You’re the best! I would die without you mate!” Louis grinned and patted him on the back. He meant what he said. Harry had saved his ass more times than he could count over the last two years they’d been working together. The _Worker of the Month_ title definitely wasn’t enough to give him proper credit for everything he’d done. 

“That’s for sure. You’d die within two days.”

 

With that he went to the common room to make Louis his favourite espresso with exactly two spoons of sugar and a little bit of love. The beverage was almost ready, just one more dash of  
sugar—

“Harry! How are you, dear? Haven't seen you in ages!” a chirpy voice exclaimed. 

He jumped and turned around.

“Janet, it’s been two days.” He deadpanned, hoping his morbid voice wouldn’t give away his lack of enthusiasm. It wasn’t that he hated Janet. Quite frankly, he liked her. It’s just… she had everything he’d ever wanted. And it was one of his please-don’t-talk-to-me days on which he usually felt like a big life failure. And her presence reminded him of that. 

“Yeah, but two days without seeing your pretty face feel like a lifetime!”

As much as he didn’t feel like smiling on that day, he half-smiled at her comment. A man needs his daily dose of compliments.

“Nice one, J. I truly do appreciate your comment.”

“Thanks, I try. What are you making? Wait, no. Let me guess. Espresso?”

“Was it the smell that gave it away?” Harry leaned on the counter and gave her a suspicious look. He grabbed a mug for himself and started preparing another coffee, this time for himself. 

“I will not confirm nor will I deny. But, you always make espresso,” Janet sniffed “which, by the way, smells heavenly. What are you, Starbucks?” She winked at him and Harry smiled half-heartedly once again. He really, really wished he wasn’t in such a bad mood today. There was nothing he could do about it, though. 

“Hey, are you okay? You seem a bit off.” Janet gave him a concerned look and put a hand on his shoulder. “You know you can always talk to me, right? We’re buddies. You can trust me with things.” 

 

**_I want to taste her lips_ **

**_Yeah, cause they taste like you_ **

 

“Who can trust you with things?” another voice suddenly joined their conversation. 

“Harry.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t do that if I were you, H. Janet, here, is quite the gossip girl, aren’t you, love?” Louis said and kissed the blonde on the cheek. She giggled and smiled at him. Then, Louis noticed the small cup of espresso standing on the counter. “Is that my coffee?” He grabbed the cup before even getting a reply and started to head towards the conference room. “Thanks again, mate. Love you!” he shouted over his shoulder. 

Janet smiled and quietly said: “Always busy, that one. I keep persuading him to take a break but he says it’s not necessary. Sometimes I wonder if he’s dating me or this company.” She gave Harry a sad smile. “But, I can’t blame him. He worked hard to get where he is now.” Janet sighed and looked at the room full of people sitting by the computers, intensely staring at the screens. “I better get going now, H. Got some work to do. My offer still stands, though. You ever want to get something off your chest, you go to me, understood?”

“Yes ma’am, thank you. Really, thank you Janet, I appreciate it.”

With that, Janet left the small kitchen space and Harry could only hear her stilettos clinking on the hallway floor. The scent of her Chanel N°5 was still lingering in the air, almost suffocating him. 

 

Harry thought about what she’d said. _You know you can always talk to me, right?_ Yeah, Janet, let’s talk about me being in love with my boss who just so happens to be your boyfriend. Definitely a great conversation topic. Let’s talk about how I’m twenty three, fresh out of college, and after years of studying my ass off I’m a secretary. Yeah, Janet, let’s talk about my constant mood swings, unhealthy sleeping schedule and the absolute lack of romance in my life caused by the fact that I have feelings for your boyfriend and my boss. I’m sure you’d love to hear about all that. 

 

He came back to his cubicle and sighed. This is when he noticed a small yellow post-it hanging on the frame of his computer. 

_want 2 grab a beer aftr wrk?_

Harry turned to his right and saw Liam looking at him with raised eyebrows. He gave him a thumbs up and grinned.

 

 

It was somewhere around eight when Harry was officially off work and ready to get drunk and spill his guts to Liam. He grabbed his black trench coat from the hanger near the kitchen area of the office and was ready to leave. 

He was slowly approaching the door when he heard a loud bang followed by an even louder “For fuck’s sake!”. 

Louis was kneeling on the floor, hastily grabbing as many papers as he could. 

“No, no, no, this can’t be happening.” He picked up the documents with shaking hands. “Why can’t something go right for once today?” His voice was wavering. 

Harry quickly went up to him and also kneeled on the floor. Wordlessly, he started to pick up all the documents that fell on the floor and stack them on a small pile. Louis’ hands were still shaking, maybe from the stress, maybe from the hectolitres of all the coffee he drank. But, he appeared to be in visible distress. Harry clasped Louis’ hands in his own, a bit bigger and warmer ones. The older man looked up at him. 

“Calm down, boss. You’re shaking and your hands are really cold, do you know that? I know you want everything to go as smoothly as possible but there are certain things on which you don’t really have a say. Like when, for example, someone says they’re gonna be late. There’s nothing you can do about it. You won’t miraculously loosen the traffic. You’re just human. No matter how many superhero movies you watch, you won’t gain any superpowers. Breathe and give yourself a break.”

Louis looked up at him, a bit stunned. The truth is, he really was stressed. Maybe he was a little over-dramatic but he just wanted things to go well. He was a perfectionist. 

“Thank you, H. I’ll try.” He looked down at their joined hands and a small blush tinted his cheeks. Harry noticed he was still holding Louis’ palms in his and he immediately let go, almost as if Louis’ hands were on fire.

“Sorry.” He got up from the floor and dusted his knees off. “Well, I should get going, don’t want Liam to drink alone. That’d look pretty sad.” He smiled when he heard Louis chuckle. His nerves were slowly fading away, _good_. “Have a lovely evening, boss. Please try not to stress, I’m sure everything will be fine.” 

“I hope so. Thanks again, Harry. I’m very grateful. Don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Was it silly that these few words meant to Harry a lot more than they probably should have?

 

***

It was late at night when he realised he couldn’t have been more grateful for the existence of Liam Payne. 

 

“Harry, mate. I think you’re holding something from me.”

Harry looked at him with raised eyebrows and said nothing, waiting for Liam to continue. 

“You look a bit…off? Not only today, I’ve noticed that like three weeks ago but decided to wait in case you wanted to tell me before I asked you. But I don’t want to wait any longer. What’s up with you?” Liam took another sip of his drink and circled his finger around the rim of the glass.

“I…don’t really know what you mean.” 

If it hadn’t been for the unsureness in his voice, Liam probably would have believed him. 

“You know exactly what I mean. If you don’t wanna tell me, that’s fine. I just want you to know that I’m here whenever you need me. And I mean it.” His voice was earnest and chocolate eyes full of warmth. “You’re like my brother. I hurts to see you pretending to be happy when you’re miserable.”

Harry finally lifted his eyes up from the glass he’d been staring at and fixed his gaze on Liam. He got up from his sear, went to where the other lad was sitting and hugged him. Liam heard sniffling and caressed Harry’s curls. 

“Let it all out, Harry.”

After a few minuted Harry stopped crying and smiled weakly.

“Sorry. Never knew I had Niagara Falls in my eyes.” He rubbed his eyes and sighed. “I just…don’t really know what to do with myself, I guess.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean I’m stuck in a place I really wanna get out of.”

“Then do it. Get out.”

“I can’t. If it was that simple I would’ve done that a long time ago. You can’t really stop loving someone, can you?” He waved at the bartender and shouted “Another one, please!” 

Liam’s eyes widened. “So that’s what it’s all about! Love?”

Harry looked at him sadly. “Yeah, unfortunately. The un-required love that everyone is dreading.”

The bartender placed two drinks in front of them. 

“So who’s the lucky person? Is it Janet? I’ve seen you look miserable after you talk to her. Don’t worry mate, I’m sure you still have a chance with her!”

Harry spat out his drink and laughed for a solid five minutes. He wiped at his eyes and laughed again. Liam just shook his arms and asked: “What? I’m just trying to connect the dots since you won’t tell me.”

“Nothing, nothing. You just picked literally the last person I could ever be in love with. Oh my God, Liam. Thanks for the laugh.” The curly haired lad chuckled again. 

“But you can’t deny the fact you’re always miserable when you see her with Louis.”

Harry shrugged, Liam’s eyes widened in realisation. “Wait…is it Louis? The person you’re in love with? Louis Tomlinson?”

“I think we only have one Louis in our office.” Harry deadpanned. 

“Yeah, one that happens to be our boss. God, Harry. Why couldn’t you choose somebody else? Literally anyone?”

“Don’t ask me, ask my dumbass fucking heart.”

“I mean… Louis is a lovely guy. I know you both get on really well and I seen the way his eyes face brightens when he spots you somewhere. It’s just-”

“I know.” 

“Hey. Everything’s going to be okay. You always say it to everyone, why not believe it for a minute?”

 

But it was very hard to believe it even for a second. 

 

 

**_I want to drown myself in a bottle of her perfume_ **

 

Christmas had always been his favourite time of the year. He loved the way London looked, all snowy with bright lights everywhere. He loved the gingerbread flavoured coffees in cute christmassy takeaway cups. But most of all, he loved giving everyone presents. It was a small act but he still hoped it showed he truly cared about somebody. So far, he’d bought presents for everyone but his sister. He had no idea what to buy Gemma but figured she’d be happy with something from Sephora. You can’t go wrong with Sephora. 

Harry didn't have bad earnings working for _Tomlinson & Co. _Louis payed him more than enough. That’s why he found himself in the perfume section looking at brands he’d never thought he would buy. That’s when he saw the bottle of Chanel N°5. He sniffed it and yeah, it was that smell. The smell Louis probably loved, the one he smelled everyday on Janet.

_If I smell like her, will you love me?_

He sprayed a bit on himself, put the bottle back on the shelf and continued looking for Gemma’s present.

***

Another great thing about Christmas was the party at work where everyone had to wear something christmassy, starting from reindeer horns and on Christmas tree costumes ending (Liam owned the party last year when he wore that. Louis gave him a raise.) 

It was a late Friday night in December. Harry was swinging his hips to Sia’s _Santa’s coming for us._ One if his coworkers, Julie, whispered something to him and he laughed loudly. He felt all the mulled wine he drank earlier hit him and smiled. Despite everything that saddened him, he felt truly happy in that moment. 

Louis was observing him from across the room. He watched with soft eyes as Harry danced and laughed. He remembered Harry telling him about Sia’s Christmas album and how much he loved it and buying the album on that day right after work. Judging from the grin on Harry’s face it was a good decision.  

“He’s a gem, isn’t he?” A voice appeared next to him.

Louis turned his head and saw Liam. 

“Yeah, he sure is.”

“You think he’ll ask Julie out or she’ll actually do it first?”

“I think- wait what?” Louis ask in a confused tone. 

“Well, they kinda seem into each other. I mean, look at how hard he’s laughing at everything she’s saying. She must either be very funny or he just wants her to like him.”

Louis frowned. 

“But… doesn’t Julie have a boyfriend?”

“Not anymore. They broke up a few weeks ago.”

“Oh. Still, I don’t think Harry’s into her.” He said dismissively. 

“How do you know it? It’s been ages since Harry last dated someone. Maybe she’s the one.” 

Harry was now slow dancing with Julie to _Snowflake._ They seemed happy. Something settled in his heart and he had no idea what it was. All he knew was that he didn’t like it. 

“I… I don’t know it. Maybe you’re right.” He weakly mumbled as Sia sang _Snowflake don't forget us._

After Harry was done dancing with Julie he went to the table and grabbed a gingerbread man. 

“I made them myself.” Louis said from behind him. Harry turned to him and asked: 

“You said that last year about the banana bread and I actually believed you until Liam exposed your ass and said your sister baked it.” 

“I swear this year I actually did something on my own. Here, look” Louis pulled out his phone and showed Harry a photo of himself by the kitchen counter, flour everywhere. “These little gingerbread men are my attempts at baking. Please tell me they taste fine or else I’d never bake again in my life.”

Harry took a bit and tapped himself on the chin.

“They’re good. Not as good as mine back when I-”

“Used to work in a bakery."

“Yeah, exactly. But still, they’re great. Good job, Louis.”

“Thanks. And what did you make this year?”

Harry gestured towards a big tray full of muffins. Some of them had little reindeers drawn on them, some had Christmas trees, some Santa hats. They looked as if they were made by a professional confectioner, which was, okay, pretty impressive. 

 “Do you always have to be so awfully good at everything you do?”

Harry blushed. “I just happen to enjoy baking.”

“We should bake together sometime. You could teach me a few things.” Louis grabbed one of Harry’s muffins and bit into it. “God, this is so good. You should open a small business, bet you’d have tons of clients. Not yet, though. We need you here, in Tomlinson & Co _._ ”

They were interrupted by Liam yelling “Pressntt time!!!”

Harry whispered to Louis “He probably had a little too much of this mulled wine you brought. Can’t blame him, though.”

Louis giggled. “You can never stop after your first sip. It’s what the Greek gods drank.”

“Obviously.”

 

Everyone gathered around a big Christmas tree under which there were tons of presents. Since Louis always wanted everyone in the company to get along well, he thought giving each other presents would be the perfect way to bring in the group spirit. 

 

Louis clapped his hands.

“Okay everyone! I’m almost a hundred percent sure you already know who your secret Santa is but in case you don’t, you’ll find out soon anyway. So, without further ado, Liam go hand out the presents!”

Liam grabbed the first package and called out: “Eloise!” 

A small brunette girl went up to him and took the present. Harry watched as she opened the package and pulled out a maroon Dior lipstick. She squealed, ran up to a girl named Lisa and attacked her with hugs.

“How did you know I wanted this lipstick? It’s perfect, thank you so much!”

“Well, when you left for the lunch break a few days ago you might have left your computer with Sephora’s website open.” Lisa laughed at her friend who was grinning from ear to ear. Pure joy. 

Than, Harry heard Liam call out his name. He went to get his present and eagerly opened it to reveal a watch. But not just any watch, no. An Armani one. Next to it, there was a note that said _Since you’re always late and I can’t wait to see you._ Then, he noticed a small mixtape titled _Espresso with sugar._ He immediately knew who his secret Santa was. He strolled over to Louis, enveloped him in a hug and whispered in his ear a small but very earnest “thank you” _._ The blue-eyed boy hugged him back and whispered back “You’re welcome, H. Happy Christmas.” 

Harry didn’t know it was even possible but he fell in love with him even more. 

 

 

**_I want her long blonde hair_ **

**_I want her magic touch_ **

**_Yeah, cause maybe then you’d want me just as much_ **

 

That night, during the Christmas party at work, Harry forgot for a moment that Louis was out of his reach. Yeah, he might had given him the most thoughtful gift and said a few sweet things but this didn't change the fact that Harry was not Janet, never will be. No matter how hard he tried. He felt as if his heart was made of frail glass that could shatter at every small inconvenience. He knew what he felt for Louis wasn’t just a crush, he was deeply in love with him. 

He saw Louis standing in the lounge and was about to approach him but Janet beat him up to it. She walked up to Louis from behind and said something to him. Her blonde hair was tied up in a ponytail and as much as it hurt Harry to admit, she was simply beautiful. Everything about her was lovely. Her bright blue eyes, her movie-star smile, her sense of style, even her personality. In Harry’s eyes Janet was absolutely flawless. He hated how much he liked her. She was the one who captured Louis’ heart, no wonder why. If he wasn’t gay he’d probably go after Janet, too. 

He watched as she played with his fingers and smiled up at him and it made him wonder if he’d ever experience what they have. He wanted to have it with Louis but nothing’s ever easy, at least that’s what everyone says. 

Still, there was a little spark of hope in his heart that he wasn’t able to doom. Because he believed in happy endings. 

It was a late December evening and Harry decided to go to a café nearby to catch up with an old friend who went for a year to his high school. They had to seat in a secluded part because apparently, Harry’s friend was a celebrity now. She was still as humble and kind as he remembered, though. They were chatting about her upcoming tour when he heard the door bell ring and saw Louis and Janet enter the café. His facial expression must’ve changed because his friend quietly asked: “Wait… is that _him_?”. 

Harry nodded. “Yeah, and the woman next to him is his girlfriend.”

“She’s very pretty.”

“I know, A.”

“Doesn’t mean you’re not. I’ll have you know, all my dancers are lusting over you.”

“Strangely, this actually made me feel a bit better.”

Harry looked again at Louis and Janet. She was doing something on her phone while he was ordering. 

“Oh, I almost forgot.” He pulled out a sheet of paper from his bag and passed it to his friend. “Here’s the song I told you about. I know I’m not a professional but I also know you’re a hopeless romantic just like me so maybe you’ll like it.” 

She read the lyrics. _Just a little bit of your heart_ was the title of the song. After she was done she looked at him and he noticed her eyes were shining with what he supposed were tears. 

“I’m sorry I’m crying but your lyrics are just very moving. It’s about him, isn't it?”

“How did you know?” He asked her jokingly. 

“Wasn’t that hard to guess, H.” She caressed his arm and smiled softly. “I’ll sing it on my next gig, definitely. Though, I’m sure it’ll have my whole audience bawling. Oh well, Merry Christmas to them!”

“Wait… but aren’t you singing on the Jingle Bell Ball here, in London? That’s like…big.”

Ariana laughed. “Yeah, so? It only means more people are gonna hear the song. I’ll make sure to mention it was written by you, you deserve the recognition, H. You’re great at writing lyrics, not to mention your voice. You sure don’t wanna try making a career out of it?”

Harry took some time before replying: “You never know, A. I might. But for now I’ll leave the stage to you.”

***

 

It was one of the last days at work before the Christmas break. He was just sitting at his cubicle, munching on an apple when he heard an ear-piercing scream:

“Aaaaahh! I can’t believe you’ve really done this! Thank you so much, baby!”

Janet. 

“Don’t mention it, love. I’m glad you like it.”

And Louis. Obviously. 

It’s not that Harry wasn’t used to them being all couple-y because believe him — he was. This still didn't change the fact that it hurt. Harry didn't have any problems with happy couples. He, however, appeared to have a problem when Louis was a part of the said happy couple. All Harry wanted was for Louis to be happy. But with him, not Janet, as much as he liked the girl. 

“Stop being so humble, boo!” Harry heard on the other side of the door to the room he worked in. “You knew how bad I wanted to be at the Jingle Bell Ball!”

Jingle Bell _what_

“And you’re going there with me! It’s gonna be the perfect winter date! Just us-”

“- and thousands of other people, crammed in one space, screaming to our ears. Romantic.” Louis gave her a tight-lipped smile. 

Janet frowned at him. “We’re gonna have a lot of fun, don’t even try to pretend you won’t like it! And we’re gonna hear Ariana Grande live! Lou, that’s …. magnificent!” She said excitedly. Louis sighed but murmured something to her that made her laugh. 

 

Harry’s apple dropped to the floor with a loud thud. 

The man he was in love with, the object of his daydreams, the same man who inspired him to write the goddamn song he gave to Ariana Grande to sing on the Jingle Bell Ball, was going to hear the damned song while probably kissing his beloved girlfriend. 

Right at this moment, Harry wondered, if a thing some people like to call _luck_ even existed in his life. 

 

It was nearing nine and Harry was ready to bid goodbye to his coworkers (Louis was probably in his office working on God knows which transaction) and go to Club Zero. It was a small club not that far away from work where every Wednesday and Friday poetry readings and small gigs were being held. People in Club Zero absolutely adored Harry. He always charmed them with his new poem, usually about love. Nobody knew the identity of his muse but if the applauses he always got were anything to go by — people didn’t really mind that. Poetry was a good way of coping with feelings. He liked the fact that some people even shed a tear once in a while, while he was reading some of his poems. It only meant that there was someone who got how he was feeling. Someone, who maybe had gone through a similar thing. It made him believe he was not the only one out there with feelings for a person he couldn't have. Harry thought that maybe sharing his feelings with strangers could help not only him but also some random person who might be struggling, too.

So he went to Club Zero to pour his heart out to strangers. 

_***_

 

“I told you the crowds would kills us.” Louis grumbled.

“But we’re alive, aren’t we? Come on, be happy!” Janet lightly punched him on the shoulder. “You look at least ten years older when you’re frowning. Dad age. And I told you, I’m too young to have children.” the blonde laughed.

Louis smiled sadly and quietly added “If you say so.” He didn't really get why Janet was so opposed to having kids. They weren't teenagers anymore —  both of them had well-paying jobs to provide for a family. _Let’s live a little first, okay Lou?_ was what Janet always said when the topic of having children was brought up. But Louis was done sleeping in expensive hotels somewhere on the Maldives. He was done treating Janet to fancy restaurants every weekend. He just wanted something that felt more homey, was ready to settle down and start a family. He wanted to bake gingerbread cookies for Christmas, not order ones made by the greatest confectioners. He wanted the homemade, oven-burned goodies he made himself (or maybe with someone’s help). Despite having more than enough money and a model-like girlfriend, Louis didn’t see his life as picture perfect. Something was missing, he just didn’t know what. ( _yet_ )

He was suddenly pulled out from his thoughts when Janet pulled at his hand and screamed: “Oh my God! Ariana’s next!”

Louis looked at the stage and here she was: a tiny girl with a huge ponytail and a big smile on her face. 

“Hey London how are you tonight?” she asked the crowd, which erupted in loud cheers. “I take that as amazing” the tiny brunette laughed. Louis zoned out for a moment while Janet was already lost in her own world.

Ariana sung some of her banger hits, such as _Side to Side_ and _Dangerous Woman._ When everyone thought her performance would be over she said: “Guys. Christmas is near and I wanna wish you all the best. I hope every single one of you will spend holidays with your loved ones and relax for a bit. Now, my time’s almost up so I’ll leave you with a one special song. It’s a ballad and was written by my talented friend Harry Styles. It’s called _Just a little bit of your heart._ ”

Louis blinked his eyes once, twice, and some more. He turned to Janet with raised eyebrows, a non spoken question _Did you hear what I just heard?_ Janet nodded, her mouth agape, just when the first piano note was heard and everyone went silent. 

And after the first few verses it was clear as a day — Harry was in love. 

 

_I can't even think straight but I can tell_

_You were just with her_

_And I'll still be a fool, I'm a fool for you_

Somewhere mid song Janet had linked her hand with Louis’ but the boy hadn't even noticed that. His mind was occupied with Harry. 

_Who are you in love with, Harry?_

However, Louis wasn’t so sure himself if he wanted to get an answer to that question. Somehow the thought of Harry being taken by anyone upset him. He might’ve had a small idea why. He had no idea what to do with it, though. 

 

***

 

**_I’ve got a girl crush_ **

 

It was nine in the morning and Harry was making black coffee to help him wake up.

_One spoonful of brown sugar and almost done_

 

He reached for the sugar bowl and was just about to pour it into his mug when a voice startled him.

“Didn’t know you and Ariana Grande were besties.” Louis whispered into his ear. Harry hoped he hadn’t noticed his shiver. 

“I… yeah.” He scratched his neck. “She went for a year to my high school before moving to America and becoming big. So technically, I knew her before she was famous.”

Louis smiled at him gently. “Very hipster-y of you, I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“But… How do you know that?” Harry asked even though he already knew the answer. How could he forget the overjoyed conversation he overheard only a few days ago? “I’ve never told you. I don’t tell people about it, don’t want them using me as their Ariana-pass.” He joked. 

“Oh, see, my dear Harold.” Louis sat on the counter in the small kitchen space they had at work. He grabbed a sugar cube and popped it into his mouth. “Janet had been talking my ears off about the Jingle Bell Ball held in our lovely London in December. _Oh Lou, I would do EVERYTHING to be there!_ ” Harry laughed at his over-dramatic Janet impression. “So I thought… _everything_? All I wanted was for her to finally shut up about the stupid ball and stop thinking I’m so dense I can’t even take her hint. Wait — more like twenty hints. So I bought two tickets, because obviously I was going, too. Boom. She gets her concert, I get my peace back.” He ate another sugar cube. How was this big child his twenty-eight year old boss? 

“Smart.” Harry nodded. “How did you like the Ball?”

“Eh, it was alright. Though I don’t really like big crowds and let me tell you, H, that crowd was preeeety big.”

Harry leaned back on the counter and took a sip of his black coffee. _Energy_. 

“But,” Louis continued “I must admit, your friend Ariana Grande is quite the performer. How the hell does she manage to jump around the stage in those heels, though? Is she even human?”

Harry laughed. “I wonder that myself.” 

“Imagine my surprise though,” Louis glanced at him mischievously “when I heard your name when she was announcing the last song. I was like: _Wait, you mean MY Harry Styles?_ ”

Harry hoped Louis wouldn't pay much attention to the blush that was quickly spreading from his neck to his cheeks. Something in his heart fluttered when he heard Louis call him _his Harry Styles._ He didn't even know it was possible to be so in love. 

“And I’m sure you’re not the only Harry Styles in the world but something in me told me you were the one she was talking about.”

“How did you know?”

“Because you’re the type of person everyone would love to have around. Even a big celebrity like Ariana Grande.”

Harry smiled bashfully and diverted his eyed to the floor. Suddenly the grey carpet seemed way more interesting than Louis’ beautiful eyes. 

“I’m not sure about that, Lou. We just know each other from school, that’s all.”

“Oh but I’m sure. Somehow, out of everyone she’d known before she got famous, she stayed friends with _you._ This says a lot, don't you think?” Louis couldn’t believe Harry didn't realise how special he was and how much he actually meant to him. How to him Harry wasn't just his employee, he was his friend. _A friend who’s constantly on your mind._

“Yeah, maybe you’re right.” Harry looked him in the eye. “I hope you’re right.”

Louis put his hand on his forearm and caressed it before quickly realising what he was doing and taking his hand back. Harry felt tingles spreading from his forearm to the whole body. 

“Harry… Who do you love?” Louis asked suddenly.

Harry looked up at him like a deer caught in headlights. The word “you” was almost rolling off his tongue. Almost. 

“Why are you asking?”

“Because I listened to the song.”

“And what did you deduce?”

“That you’re in love.”

Harry snorted. “Yeah, no shit.”

Louis punched him in the arm lightly. “Hey, I’m trying to help.”

Harry looked at him for a moment then said: “There’s not much you can do about it, Lou. Actually, there’s nothing at all.” He studied Louis’ soft features for a moment. How today his hair seemed a bit disheveled, how his stubble was present again, how blue and electric his eyes were despite the early morning hours. “I’m not their only.” 

Louis gave him a small smile. “But you’re still their one.”

Harry took the last sip of his coffee and looked at the ceiling, suddenly feeling a lot more emotional than five minutes ago. He took a deep breath trying to compose himself and looked at Louis. “Sometimes, being somebody’s one is not enough. What if I want to be their only?”

He wanted to laugh at how ridiculous the whole situation was. Then, a new voice joined their conversation.

“What’re you talking about guys?” Liam nodded at the both of them.

“Just trying to figure out how to help Harold here, apparently he’s in love with someone who already has their other half.”

Liam’s eyes almost bulged out of his head and he tried to very discretely mumble to Harry _what did you tell him, mate?_ when a phone interrupted their chat. 

“Oh oh, it’s the damned Smithson&Brad. Gotta take this one.” Louis turned to Harry and laid his hand on the green-eyed lad’s shoulder. “Harry, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m more than willing to listen. I’m always here for you.” And with that, he went to his office, leaving the two lads dumbfounded. 

“Harry…” Liam started. “How did this conversation even start?”

Harry sighed and motioned to their small office. While they were woking, he asked “Liam. You know I’m friends with Ariana Grande, right?” Liam stopped walking.

“You’re friends with _who_? You’re joking, aren't you.”

“Well, no. Anyway, do you remember the poem I let you read the last time? _Just a little bit of your heart_?”

“The one that made me cry?”

“Yeah, that one. So I might have given it to Ariana as lyrics for her new song and she might have sung it during the Jingle Bell Ball and Louis and Janet might have been there.”

Liam looked at him as if he had grown two extra heads. 

“So Louis heard the song and knows you’re in love. He just doesn’t know it’s him that you’re in love with.”

“Basically.”

It was somewhere around the evening when Harry thought about his conversation with Louis and his words played in the back of his mind: _Because I listened to the song._

 

_But did you hear what I was trying to say?_

_***_

 

“Boss, it’s your fourth coffee today. You’re too young to go into a cardiac arrest.”

Louis smoothed his suit with shaky hands. 

“You’re right, Liam. I guess I just want everything to go well.”

“I’m sure it will. Besides, you won’t be there alone, Janet will be right by your side, right?”

Louis weakly smiled. “Yeah.” He coughed twice and opened a water bottle. “Liam, tell me about your plans for tonight. I need to stop thinking about this stupid banquet and corrupt my thoughts with something pleasant.”

“Well, since tonight it’s Friday, Club Zero-”

“The one that Harry loves so much? I have to go there one day.”

“Yeah, that one. What I was saying is that since it’s Friday, Club Zero has another one of its poetry readings and I’m going there with Harry, maybe even he’s gonna perform something because everyone there apparently loves hopeless romantics like him. 

“I wish I could go there with you instead to that stupid banquet with a bunch of pricks” Louis grumbled. 

“Cheer up boss, you still have plenty chances to go there because it’s every Wednesday and Friday. I’m sure at least one date will fit into your schedule.” Liam winked and patted Louis on the back. “For now, go to that stupid banquet and be the king that you are!”

Louis laughed. “Thanks, Liam. You’re the best.”

 

It was fifteen minuted after eight and she still wasn’t there. Louis was hopping from one foot to the other and tapping his watch impatiently. He tried to call her once again but Janet wasn’t pickling up. After the fifth call he eventually heard back from her. 

“Janet, where the fuck are you?! The banquet starts in fifteen minutes!” he whisper-yelled to the receiver.

“Lou, my love. I told you yesterday that I’m going tonight with the girls to the beautician. I’ve booked the visit over a month ago. I couldn’t just reschedule it, she doesn't have any free dates.”

“Couldn’t you just cancel it? I told you a lot depends on how this event goes. Some things are more important than getting your nails done as if you couldn't wait one more fucking day.”

“More like a one month. Lou, I’ve been waiting for the meeting with my girls for ages and you know it.”

“Oh, so now I’m the bad guy for asking my girlfriend to resign from one meeting with friends for the sake of helping her boyfriend in a transaction of national importance? Good to know.” Louis was annoyed, upset and slowly realising something. “I thought I could count on you, not only when it’s convenient to you. You always could on me.”

“Baby, it’s not like that.”

“It’s not? The why am I standing in front of the goddamn The Savoy alone like a fucking idiot, waiting for my girlfriend to show up because she forgot to mention she’d be having her nails done when I’m having one of the most important nights in my life?”

There was silence on the other end of the life. 

“That’s what I thought. I see we have different perception of things, Janet. I think it’s time for us to part ways,” he said coldly.

“See, for you it’s always work this, work that.” she grumbled. “You almost never have time for me.”

“I took you on a Jingle Bell Ball one fucking week ago. I take you out every week.” He whispered angrily to the receiver.  “You know what, there’s no use arguing.” Louis was already tired and he hasn’t even entered the banquet yet. “Bye, Janet. I hope you have a happy life and meet someone who has the same values as you.” And with that he ended the call and entered the hotel with a — surprisingly — light heart. 

 

Two hours in and Louis had already talked to everyone he wanted to. He charmed his way to every businessman’s heart without the help of his model-looking (ex) girlfriend. He was rather pleased. However, what was there to do other than talk to boring men about bitcoins and complimenting their wives’ necklaces. All the boredom gave him some time to think about the argument he had with Janet. Sure, he could apologise and fix things between them. But — did he really want to? They were different. Also, he realised his feelings towards her had worn off quite some time ago, no matter how many times he told himself they didn’t. It still hurt, to be stood up like that. Especially in such an important moment in his life. 

Deciding he couldn’t stand spending another minute surrounded by the fake snobby people, Louis left the hotel and decided to go on a walk to clear up his thoughts. It was late at night, the only places that were open were pubs and night clubs. Yet, he somehow ended up near his work place. 

“Always at work” he mumbled self-depreciatingly and smiled to himself. He walked past a club, decided _Why not?_ and felt the smell of cinnamon fill his senses after he entered the place. 

“Two shots please.” He told the bartender and sat on a barstool, far in the back of the club. He noticed a lot of people were gathered on the opposite side of the place and asked the bartender: “What’s going on tonight in here?” 

“We’re having a poetry reading and if someone wanted to perform a song they also can do that. Just your typical chill at Club Zero,”

It’s then that it hit Louis what Liam had said earlier on that night.  

_Club Zero has another one of its poetry readings and I’m going there with Harry._

He tried his best to see if he could find the guys, just when he heard:

“And now give a warm welcome to your favourite hopeless romantic Harry Styles!”

Harry went on the stage and was met with a round of applause and smiled at his small audience. 

“Okay guys. So today I’m gonna perform a song that I’ve been working on for the past two weeks. Hope you’ll like it. It’s called _Girl Crush_.” He smiled shyly.

“Girl Crush?” Louis mumbled to himself. “I thought he was gay.” 

 

He stared at Harry as he played the first few chords of the song on the guitar and closed his eyes. 

_I got a girl crush_

_Hate to admit it but_

_I got a heart rush_

_Ain't slowing down_

 

The audience was silent, almost as if Harry casted a spell on everyone. 

 

_I got it real bad_

_Want everything she has_

_That smile and that midnight laugh_

_She's giving you now_

 

That’s when Louis realised this wasn’t a song addressed to a girl. 

 

_I want to taste her lips_

_Yeah, 'cause they taste like you_

_I want to drown myself_

_In a bottle of her perfume_

 

That’s when Louis remembered that Janet once told him that Harry complimented her perfumes and she poured some of her Chanel N°5 on his shirt. 

 

_I want her long blonde hair_

_I want her magic touch_

_Yeah, 'cause maybe then_

_You'd want me just as much_

That’s when he realised why Harry said he’s somebody’s one but not their only and there was nothing Louis could do about it. 

 

_I got a girl crush_

On Janet. But the little bit of heart that he wanted was Louis’. 

After Harry was done with his song he was met with a roaring applause. “Wow, thanks everyone. I certainly was not expecting that.” he said a bit overwhelmed.

 _I think I love you too,_ Louis thought. 

“Like hell you weren’t!” Liam said and everyone laughed, including Harry. The curly haired lad glanced for a second to the far back of the club but thankfully didn't notice Louis who now was crawling on the floor, trying to leave the club unnoticed. He didn’t want to startle Harry like that in a club that was his safe space. He’d startle him somewhere else. 

***

The last day of work before the Christmas break was hell. Harry was drowning in paperwork and caffeine, Liam was trying to maintain his healthy lifestyle but was on a verge of grabbing a RedBull and Louis was trying his best to stay collected and calm every time he heard _Last Christmas_ playing on the work radio. 

“I think you should buy her a bracelet.” said Harry eloquently.

“But I don't know what kind of bracelet she’d like. You can pick one, though.”

“Just because I’m gay doesn't mean I’ll magically happen to know what kind of jewellery your mother likes, Liam. It’s your mother, not mine.”

A knock on the door interrupted their chat and Louis entered their small office. 

“Hey guys, sorry I was just walking by and noticed there were absolutely no sheets of paper in the photocopying machine. Liam, could you do me a favour and grab some right now? I barely can even leave my office now.” Louis smiled apologetically. 

“On it, boss.” and with that he left the room. Harry’s heart rate sped up because without Liam it was only him and Louis in the small space. 

“Oh, and Harry?” Harry’s eyes snapped to Louis’. “Can I also ask you something?”

“Always.”

Louis smiled fondly at him.

“So I might have a problem. My family’s visiting me for Christmas and I have to prepare some treats for everybody. Cause, you know, I have a pretty big family. And since everyone’s bringing something, I have to prepare sweet treats. Like gingerbread cookies, muffins, you know the drill.”

Harry winced. “Poor people, they don’t know you can’t bake, do they?”

“Hey, you said the gingerbread men I baked for the Christmas event we had last week weren’t that bad!”

“Miraculously they were pretty good. But how will you manage to bake that and a few more other things for your whole family? I know your sisters have a sweet tooth.” Harry smirked.

“See and this is where comes the part where I ask you for help. Come over tomorrow and help me? Pretty please with a cherry on top? You love baking and you’re actually good at it, unlike some of us. Save my Christmas? Please?” With every sentence he said, Louis somehow got closer and closer to where Harry was sitting at his cubicle. Now, he was crouching right next to Harry and looking deeply into his green orbs. 

  
“Of course I’ll help you, Lou.” Harry smiled at him. _How could I not?_

“Thank you! You’re the bestest of the best!” Louis exclaimed while hugging Harry with all his might. Harry was shocked for a moment before he returned the hug and enveloped Louis in his arms. 

“I’ll text you my address,” mumbled Louis into his shoulder. 

***

It was nearly four in the afternoon and Harry was trying his best to shake off his nerves while entering a very modern-looking apartment complex in Soho.

“Excuse me Sir, who are you looking for?” came a voice from behind a wooden desk. 

“Um… Louis Tomlinson?” Harry eyed the man warily. 

“This way to the lift, sir. Tomlinson lives in the penthouse, which is on the last floor.”

“Thanks.” Harry smiled and headed towards the lift.

The doors opened and revealed what possibly was the most beautiful apartment Harry has ever seen.

“Oh, you’re finally here! Here, gimme your coat.” Louis hooked his coat on his hanger and Harry took a second to peer at him. He was wearing a cooking apron and had flour in his hair. He looked unbelievably cute but at the same time handsome as ever. He passed Harry a white apron. “Here, put it on and save the day!”

Harry smiled at him. “Good to see you, Lou.”

 

They’ve been baking muffins and gingerbread cookies according to Harry’s golden recipes for over an hour when Harry suddenly said: “You have a beautiful apartment. Or should I say penthouse.”

“Thanks. I designed it myself. Though, it gets a little lonely sometimes. This much space for a one person can sometimes be too much.”

Harry frowned. “Doesn’t Janet live with you, though?”

“She never lived with me when we were together.” Louis went up to the oven and pulled out a tray of freshly baked cinnamon muffins. 

Harry felt his heart stop beating. “Were?”

Louis tried to hide his smile from Harry. “We broke up yesterday. Well, I broke up with her when she stood me up and didn’t come to the banquet I told you about some time ago.”

When Louis looked at Harry he was met with a sad pair of green eyes. 

“I’m sorry to hear that, Lou. I can’t imagine how awful that must’ve felt.”

Louis nodded. “Pretty awful. I was already stressed enough.” Louis took one of the muffins and was about to bite it when Harry snatched it from his hands.

“Careful! You shouldn’t eat them when they’re straight outta the oven or you’ll get a stomachache!”

Louis made an attempt to take the muffin back from Harry while saying: “Worth it!”

Somewhere during their fight over a muffin they ended up on the floor laying in flower mixed with some eggs that fell from the table. 

Suddenly Harry calmly stated: “I wouldn't have stood you up like that.”

Louis looked at him. They were laying side by side. “I know.”

“I would’ve gone to that stupid banquet.”

The blue eyed boy looked at him adoringly. “I know.” He caressed his cheek. “That’s when I realised how stupid I was. God, I really was stupid”  he laughed. 

Harry glanced at him curiously. “What do you mean?”

“I picked the wrong _only_. The _only_ I should’ve picked is the one laying right here beside me in the flour. That’s the _only_ that has never let me down. Not even once. And…”

“And…?” Harry whispered.

“And that’s the _only_ my heart had secretly longed for. The _only_ that loved me despite me being in a relationship. The one that always sensed when something was wrong and helped me calm my nerves. The one that has always had my back.” Louis whispered back. 

“How did you know you’re the one I love?” Harry asked, almost afraid to break their little trance. 

“I left the banquet early and somehow ended up in Club Zero. And I heard you. And I listened.”

“Oh.” Harry looked at the ceiling. “Well, now you know.” He laughed quietly. 

Louis looked at him like he hung the Moon. He put his hand on Harry’s cheek and kissed him. It was nothing like kissing Janet. Kissing Janet didn’t feel like coming home after being away for years. Kissing Janet didn’t feel like unconditional love. Kissing Janet didn’t feel like the promise _I’ll support you no matter what_ and _I’ll always be there for you._ But kissing Harry did. 

“Now I know.” Louis caressed his face. “God, you’re so easy to love.”

“Says you.” Harry entwined their fingers. “You can eat the muffin now, by the way. I bet it’s cooled down.” 

Louis grabbed the pastry and stuffed his mouth with it. “I should just hire you as my chef and keep you here forever.” He nudged Harry with his elbow. 

“I wouldn't mind that.” The green eyed lad looked at him lovingly. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Leave a kudo/comment if you'd like x  
> Come chat with me on twitter! I'm @swiftIouie :-)


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